Texting: The 10 Commandments for Relationships

by @SteveLittAdvice on Saturday, April 19th, 2014

Texting has become the easiest way for most of us to communicate with those we love.

Texts are simple, quick and direct. The biggest problems with texting is that it can cause damage to relationships and to lives when the texting is done by a driver.

They don’t yet have ads on the margins. You don’t have to have to have minutes of chit chat. You don’t have to spell well. OMG, you don’t have to sort through spam. Texts can now be generated by voice from  smartphones.

Two Additional  problems:  Texts can’t be blocked easily and whatever you text will be out in the universe forever.

The number of texts generated in a day across the world is growing exponentially.

This rapid growth requires a set of rules for texting. Let me give you 10 rules I’ve learned as a therapist and a text junkie. Maybe these will help.


10 Commandments of Relationship Texting

Don’t you feel privileged?

  1. Don’t text when you’ve been drinking. This is mandatory and I’m sure you’ll agree to use my new (yet to be developed) app that has a built in breathalyser control on the text function.
  2. Text only simple messages regarding time, distance, addresses and simple questions like “Do we need more milk? I’m at the store.” Remember this: “You never loved me” is not a simple message meant for text.
  3. Avoid text arguments. No one knows what tone of voice or inflection you mean when you text WTF. It’s like those ink blot tests; anyone can read into whatever they want. Text wars leave many casualties. Same for email wars.
  4. Read the text before you send it.(See Rule 1) Autofill can make you sound stupid and sometimes mean.
  5. Don’t text when you’re angry or lonely. There is no doubt that texting when you’re angry feels good. Screaming “take that” as you forcefully stab the send button feels soooo good.
  6. Don’t break up with someone via text and don’t try to explain it in a 6000 word text.
  7. Don’t save nasty texts from your significant other and show them to your friends and family. She said, He said is not useful to anyone. It also makes you look bad.
  8. Never text anything sexual. A recent Time magazine survey found that close to 10% of US males admit to arranging adulterous hookups, via text. In India it was 37%. Between Sexting and adultery it is not smart to do either. Politicians, please note this rule.
  9. Texting on the toilet is OK. (See Rule 1) Just don’t tell us that you’re on the toilet. Please! Phone calls on the toilet are not OK, EVER!!
  10. This is the most important of all the rules. Don’t text while driving or don’t send a text to someone you know is driving at the  time. Someone could die. Nothing is so important that it can’t wait for you to pull over to a safe place before texting.